I've now finished my first year at uni and WOW has life changed in the last year! I've learnt a lot about myself with the new found freedom that living away from home gave me. I'm not exactly the person I thought I was, but that's okay! - I'm still growing every day and trying to better myself all the time. I know who I want to be and what I want to achieve but I've gotta remember to enjoy the journey aswell!
Another thing I've learnt over the last year is that you've really gotta do the things you want to in life whilst you still can! Life seems to have suddenly sped up for me and there's so much I wanna squeeze into this short life so I better get on with it! Regret is the worst feeling in the world and I wanna aim to make the most of every situation so I'm never wondering "what if?". I'd love to build my confident enough to be able to do everything I want to, and stop worrying what others will think. At the end of the day, happiness is the most important thing in the world, and if doing something makes me happy, why shouldn't I?!
So this is going to be my last blog post... I want to actually get on with living my life, instead of just talking about it! I'm glad I made this blog because it'll be nice to look back on in a few years and remember what life was like during the transition from teenager to adult.
So fare thee well fellow bloggers! Now stop looking at this computer screen and go LIVE YOUR LIFE...
Monday, 21 July 2014
Thursday, 12 September 2013
A year on...
So it's been over a year since I started this blog and although I haven't written on it much, it has been a good way to keep a (sortof) regular journal and it's really cool to look back at how my life was a year ago compared to now. Everything is so different!
My church internship is now over and that's probably the thing that's changed me the most in the past year. I feel so much more grown up, having experienced a bit more of the world, and a working environment. I'm ready to be a proper adult now- leave home, go to uni, live by myself (well with other students, but without parents who I'm used to being my personal alarm clocks and cooking me dinner every night). And I'm actually going to have to be responsible for the first time in my life! It's quite overwhelming when I really think about how much my life's gonna change but I'm just taking it all in my stride and can't wait to start this next chapter!
I'm also way more directed now and know a bit more about where I'm heading, my goals and ambitions, and what type of person I want to keep striving towards becoming.
Another awesome thing that's come out of this year is improving my relationship with God and becoming even closer to Him. I've now got an everyday relationship with Him, sharing the ins and outs of my life knowing that He cares and wants to be part of it! I've tried really hard to keep Him at the centre of my life and because of this I feel like I've made some clever decisions this year and am way more prepared to keep making decisions in line with His will! I've learnt to listen to His voice and see Him at work in every aspect of my life, even the parts I consider as insignificant. These next four years could potentially be the best years of my life and I just know God's got amazing things up His sleeve for me!
That's all for now, folks
Peace & Love xo
Tuesday, 5 March 2013
Oops!
Today is Tuesday 5th March 2013, which means I haven't posted on this blog in over four months.. OOPS! My bad! Guess I've been lazy about writing it, but I'm going to get back into it, I promise! I've never been very good at keeping diaries but I'm using this as my version of one to look back on in the future and remember the "good 'ol days". And by making it a public blog, it means I have to keep it up-to-date, otherwise I just look boring!
So here goes nothing...
To think it's almost 1/4 of the way through 2013 is craaaaazy! But looking back, there's already been loads of awesome stuff that's happened this year and I know there's so much more to come!
I'll admit that at the beginning of 2013 I was on the "new year, new me" bandwagon for a while. The new year is always refreshing and feels like a new start.. but in reality, it's no different to any other time in the year and you can make a change in your life whenever you want to - you don't need a new date for an excuse to better yourself!
For reasons I'm not really sure of, in the last few months, I've become a lot more confident and secure in who I am. So I got over the "new year, new me" phase and realized that even though I'm not perfect... that's okay because no-one is except Jesus! God designed me to be unique from everyone else and I don't want to change myself to be someone I'm not just because that's what the media or society tells me to do! I am perfect in the eyes of my Creator, and that's the only opinion I care about! Nothing I can do will make Him love me more or less than He does right now and that's unbelievably comforting to know! Now, the only way in which I'm trying to change myself is to be more like Jesus. He is the perfect example of how to live our human lives and in all I do I want to become more like Him! That's the only way I can make myself better than I am today.. not by getting better clothes or nicer hair, or having a really good-looking boyfriend, or even having loads of friends.
I'm so fortunate to have this internship with my church because it's really helping me grow and moulding me to be more Jesus-like! Serving in my church, being challenged with new tasks, constantly being surrounded with supportive people, and most importantly, being able to spend a lot of time with God in prayer, bible study sessions, and general worship in my every day life has led to me really accepting how much God loves me and how special I am to Him. He's helped me become so much more comfortable in my skin and actually love myself instead of wanting to change every aspect of my being like I've wanted to for so many years! Having the pressure of changing who I am to please others off my shoulders is such a relief. Now, I can just relax and be me! Don't get me wrong, I'm not completely there yet. I'm still on the journey to self-acceptance and I do struggle a lot with falling into old thinking habits, but God always draws me back to Him saying "Come and find comfort in me. Accept my love into your heart and let it take over your whole being. Your life will never be the same again."
So if you're reading this, firstly thank you for sticking with me through all my rambling above, and secondly just take a minute to reflect on how much God loves you. All the things I've talked about apply just as much to you as they do to me. God is seeking you and will never stop pursuing you. Let Him in. Let His love fill your heart and you won't need to find acceptance anywhere else!
P.S. I recently got a tattoo that reads "Found in Grace" because my identity, my worth, my whole life is rooted (or "found"), in God's unyielding love for me and all the undeserving gifts he's blessed me with!
So here goes nothing...
To think it's almost 1/4 of the way through 2013 is craaaaazy! But looking back, there's already been loads of awesome stuff that's happened this year and I know there's so much more to come!
I'll admit that at the beginning of 2013 I was on the "new year, new me" bandwagon for a while. The new year is always refreshing and feels like a new start.. but in reality, it's no different to any other time in the year and you can make a change in your life whenever you want to - you don't need a new date for an excuse to better yourself!
For reasons I'm not really sure of, in the last few months, I've become a lot more confident and secure in who I am. So I got over the "new year, new me" phase and realized that even though I'm not perfect... that's okay because no-one is except Jesus! God designed me to be unique from everyone else and I don't want to change myself to be someone I'm not just because that's what the media or society tells me to do! I am perfect in the eyes of my Creator, and that's the only opinion I care about! Nothing I can do will make Him love me more or less than He does right now and that's unbelievably comforting to know! Now, the only way in which I'm trying to change myself is to be more like Jesus. He is the perfect example of how to live our human lives and in all I do I want to become more like Him! That's the only way I can make myself better than I am today.. not by getting better clothes or nicer hair, or having a really good-looking boyfriend, or even having loads of friends.
So if you're reading this, firstly thank you for sticking with me through all my rambling above, and secondly just take a minute to reflect on how much God loves you. All the things I've talked about apply just as much to you as they do to me. God is seeking you and will never stop pursuing you. Let Him in. Let His love fill your heart and you won't need to find acceptance anywhere else!
P.S. I recently got a tattoo that reads "Found in Grace" because my identity, my worth, my whole life is rooted (or "found"), in God's unyielding love for me and all the undeserving gifts he's blessed me with!
Wednesday, 10 October 2012
Getting old!
I haven't posted in a while and as I'm having a rare, well-deserved quiet night in, I thought I'd make the most of it and make a new small post for anyone out there who cares! Haha :)
So I turned 19 on Saturday which felt superrr weird as it's one step closer to not being a teenager anymore! Wahhh :( In some ways I want to stay young forever because I feel like this time in my life is when I should be living life to the full and taking advantage of everything so when I look back I can say these were the best years of my life.. but on the other hand I'm really loving my life since I've finished education. I feel like I've started growing up because of the responsibility that comes with the internship and my new retail job and I like feeling self-dependent! I didn't think I'd feel this way but it's honestly a relief not to have to rely on my parents as much anymore for little things like lunch money haha! (Of course I still live with them so am blessed to have a hot meal cooked for me at least once a day, and this I have no problem with relying on them for!)
Anyway, my birthday was so much fun, I got lots of lovely presents and was spoilt immensely by my parents :) But the best part was just having everyone I love together in one room. Introducing my family to my church family and my church family to my friends was so great and they all instantly got on which gave me such a warm fuzzy feeling hehe! I honestly can't believe how lucky and blessed I am to have such amazing people in my life. Sorry for all the cliches in this post but I just want to shout about how happy I am!
The first month of the internship at my church has been absolutely flipping mental, with sooo much stuff going on! But it's all paid off and it's been so worth it because we're starting to see such progress in all of our plans for this year. I'm still buzzing off everything God's put on my heart for the year ahead, and I know there's so much more to come from Him that I can't even begin to imagine! I'm really loving working in a church and event planning youth socials and I'm starting to think that maybe God's given me these gifts of passion and organisation for this reason. He's led me to where I am now and it's been pretty good so far so I've just gotta trust Him to take me the rest of the way!
Like usual, I could go on for many more paragraphs but I'm forcing myself to stop now and get some rest :)
Night and God bless, you beautiful people!
So I turned 19 on Saturday which felt superrr weird as it's one step closer to not being a teenager anymore! Wahhh :( In some ways I want to stay young forever because I feel like this time in my life is when I should be living life to the full and taking advantage of everything so when I look back I can say these were the best years of my life.. but on the other hand I'm really loving my life since I've finished education. I feel like I've started growing up because of the responsibility that comes with the internship and my new retail job and I like feeling self-dependent! I didn't think I'd feel this way but it's honestly a relief not to have to rely on my parents as much anymore for little things like lunch money haha! (Of course I still live with them so am blessed to have a hot meal cooked for me at least once a day, and this I have no problem with relying on them for!)
Anyway, my birthday was so much fun, I got lots of lovely presents and was spoilt immensely by my parents :) But the best part was just having everyone I love together in one room. Introducing my family to my church family and my church family to my friends was so great and they all instantly got on which gave me such a warm fuzzy feeling hehe! I honestly can't believe how lucky and blessed I am to have such amazing people in my life. Sorry for all the cliches in this post but I just want to shout about how happy I am!
The first month of the internship at my church has been absolutely flipping mental, with sooo much stuff going on! But it's all paid off and it's been so worth it because we're starting to see such progress in all of our plans for this year. I'm still buzzing off everything God's put on my heart for the year ahead, and I know there's so much more to come from Him that I can't even begin to imagine! I'm really loving working in a church and event planning youth socials and I'm starting to think that maybe God's given me these gifts of passion and organisation for this reason. He's led me to where I am now and it's been pretty good so far so I've just gotta trust Him to take me the rest of the way!
Like usual, I could go on for many more paragraphs but I'm forcing myself to stop now and get some rest :)
Night and God bless, you beautiful people!
Wednesday, 5 September 2012
My gap year!
So my gap year plans are really starting to come together which I'm super excited about! Some great opportunities have come my way and I can't wait to take advantage of them all! God's got some really cool stuff lined up for me and my church family and I hope we can really make an impact this coming year!
Me and one of my best friends are doing an internship at our church this year. Not only will we be helping running Christian Unions at local schools (including our old one!), we'll be involved in other youth work like a new multi-church youth group we're trying to set up. I think working with young people will be so fun because we pretty much are still kids at heart :)
We'll also be doing assemblies in schools (ahhh!) and other challenging things but I know this will only help us grow in ourselves and our faith.
Our church also has lots of great ideas and plans for doing good in the community but as they're not definite yet I won't jinx it by putting them on here. Although when they do happen I'm sure I'll be writing about them all the time!
This year is gonna be so crazy, not only is there tons of stuff going on so I'm gonna be super busy, but this will be my first year out in the "big wide world". I may not be moving away but I'll still get a taste of what it's like to be an adult with responsibilities and commitments. My usual routine of school is completely gone now but I feel like I'm ready for this new one to begin! It'll take some adjustment but I really can't wait for this year and all it's potential.
As for a job, I'm starting to look for one this week. Although I'd love to spend the whole of the year in the church, I need to be realistic and find a job to support myself and to gain more experience in a work environment (yawnnnnn)
One last thing.. Since September 1st I've been following Soul Survivor's Bible in one year. I won't start preaching about how great the bible is (although it is!), but just to any Christians out there reading this who like me, found the bible very intimidating and didn't know where to begin.. Please try a BIOY plan. The daily reading is completely manageable and I've found myself wanting even more to read each day! It's such a great starting point and doing it with a group of friends or finding a site that has daily blogs (like Soul Survivor) is such great motivation to keep you going. Okay I'm not gonna get carried away because it's only been 5 days and I could very well lose my excitement for it (although I pray I don't) but I've learnt so much more through God's word this past week than I have in years!
It's coming up to 2am now and I'm getting pretty tired. I could probably babble on for a few more paragraphs but I don't want to bore you even more :)
Peace outttttttt
Me and one of my best friends are doing an internship at our church this year. Not only will we be helping running Christian Unions at local schools (including our old one!), we'll be involved in other youth work like a new multi-church youth group we're trying to set up. I think working with young people will be so fun because we pretty much are still kids at heart :)
We'll also be doing assemblies in schools (ahhh!) and other challenging things but I know this will only help us grow in ourselves and our faith.
Our church also has lots of great ideas and plans for doing good in the community but as they're not definite yet I won't jinx it by putting them on here. Although when they do happen I'm sure I'll be writing about them all the time!
This year is gonna be so crazy, not only is there tons of stuff going on so I'm gonna be super busy, but this will be my first year out in the "big wide world". I may not be moving away but I'll still get a taste of what it's like to be an adult with responsibilities and commitments. My usual routine of school is completely gone now but I feel like I'm ready for this new one to begin! It'll take some adjustment but I really can't wait for this year and all it's potential.
As for a job, I'm starting to look for one this week. Although I'd love to spend the whole of the year in the church, I need to be realistic and find a job to support myself and to gain more experience in a work environment (yawnnnnn)
One last thing.. Since September 1st I've been following Soul Survivor's Bible in one year. I won't start preaching about how great the bible is (although it is!), but just to any Christians out there reading this who like me, found the bible very intimidating and didn't know where to begin.. Please try a BIOY plan. The daily reading is completely manageable and I've found myself wanting even more to read each day! It's such a great starting point and doing it with a group of friends or finding a site that has daily blogs (like Soul Survivor) is such great motivation to keep you going. Okay I'm not gonna get carried away because it's only been 5 days and I could very well lose my excitement for it (although I pray I don't) but I've learnt so much more through God's word this past week than I have in years!
It's coming up to 2am now and I'm getting pretty tired. I could probably babble on for a few more paragraphs but I don't want to bore you even more :)
Peace outttttttt
Monday, 27 August 2012
Summer time!
So it turns out I'm not as good at blogging as I was hoping.. haven't posted in months! Oops!
Honestly though I've been super busy this summer so that's the main reason behind my lack of posting.
Firstly in July/early August I was away doing a project in India with my school. A group of 30 of us went to a town called Tirunevelli in south India to work in and help build schools. We also got to experience the culture out there and even did a few touristy type activities like visiting a temple and a group of waterfalls. Overall it was probably the best three weeks of my life. I was completely out of my comfort zone and deeply challenged but I learnt so much about myself and who I want to be. It's a cliche but it really did open my eyes to how some people are living and you can't help but appreciate all that God's blessed you and your family with. Although it did make me question why these innocent people are suffering, it also showed me that I was put in this position to help people in these situations. I know God's called me to help people less fortunate than myself and I was lucky enough to have a taste of that this summer. I'm still not sure on what exact job I want in the future but I know whatever I do it'll be for the benefit of others. It just feels right to use what you have to change other people's lives. The project was a massive success. Everyone had the time of their life and we all became so close from living together 24/7 for three weeks! I think the project is such a great way for young people to do something proactive and good whilst also learning about themselves and what they want in life. Hopefully the trip will keep running each year for our school because I know hundreds of kids could benefit from it like I did!
So when I got back from India, I gave myself about a week to recover (which meant junk food and movie days). Although I didn't get as homesick out there as I thought I would, it was still such a relief to see my family again. I'd missed the familiarity and comfort of home. For the past three weeks since I've been back I've just been seeing my friends as much as possible. Most of them will be leaving for uni within the next month and so we're taking advantage of every second we have together now! In the past few months I've gotten closer with a lot of people and I'm gutted that our friendship will only be like this for a couple more weeks. I'm fortunate enough to have such amazing friends and I know I'll never be this young and free again so I've got to appreciate every minute. The last few of us turned 18 this summer which meant even more going out and painting the town red! I've had the best summer of my life and really really don't want it to end.
As for uni, I've decided this is not the right time for me to go. Firstly, I don't feel ready to leave home, live on my own and be totally independent. Secondly, I'm completely undecided on which course I would want to take and which direction my life's going in. And thirdly, I feel God calling me towards doing good this year, taking my first year out of education for 14 years and really sorting out my plans for the future. He's already used me so much this past year and now He's ready to use me even more. I know He's got great plans for me to help serve Him and help others. Hopefully this year will see quite a few things ticked off my bucket list! I also plan to use this year out as a way to clear my head and really help me decide where I want to go in the future and how I can get there. I think since joining my church a year ago and going to India this summer I've started to realise who I want to be, my main question now is how do I become that person. So I'm giving this year in my life to God. So we can develop our relationship further, so He can use me for good and so He can help me find my identity.
Think that's about all for now folks! Sorry about the essay of a post but a lot's been going on that I wanted to get off my chest!
Laterzzzz
Honestly though I've been super busy this summer so that's the main reason behind my lack of posting.
Firstly in July/early August I was away doing a project in India with my school. A group of 30 of us went to a town called Tirunevelli in south India to work in and help build schools. We also got to experience the culture out there and even did a few touristy type activities like visiting a temple and a group of waterfalls. Overall it was probably the best three weeks of my life. I was completely out of my comfort zone and deeply challenged but I learnt so much about myself and who I want to be. It's a cliche but it really did open my eyes to how some people are living and you can't help but appreciate all that God's blessed you and your family with. Although it did make me question why these innocent people are suffering, it also showed me that I was put in this position to help people in these situations. I know God's called me to help people less fortunate than myself and I was lucky enough to have a taste of that this summer. I'm still not sure on what exact job I want in the future but I know whatever I do it'll be for the benefit of others. It just feels right to use what you have to change other people's lives. The project was a massive success. Everyone had the time of their life and we all became so close from living together 24/7 for three weeks! I think the project is such a great way for young people to do something proactive and good whilst also learning about themselves and what they want in life. Hopefully the trip will keep running each year for our school because I know hundreds of kids could benefit from it like I did!
So when I got back from India, I gave myself about a week to recover (which meant junk food and movie days). Although I didn't get as homesick out there as I thought I would, it was still such a relief to see my family again. I'd missed the familiarity and comfort of home. For the past three weeks since I've been back I've just been seeing my friends as much as possible. Most of them will be leaving for uni within the next month and so we're taking advantage of every second we have together now! In the past few months I've gotten closer with a lot of people and I'm gutted that our friendship will only be like this for a couple more weeks. I'm fortunate enough to have such amazing friends and I know I'll never be this young and free again so I've got to appreciate every minute. The last few of us turned 18 this summer which meant even more going out and painting the town red! I've had the best summer of my life and really really don't want it to end.
As for uni, I've decided this is not the right time for me to go. Firstly, I don't feel ready to leave home, live on my own and be totally independent. Secondly, I'm completely undecided on which course I would want to take and which direction my life's going in. And thirdly, I feel God calling me towards doing good this year, taking my first year out of education for 14 years and really sorting out my plans for the future. He's already used me so much this past year and now He's ready to use me even more. I know He's got great plans for me to help serve Him and help others. Hopefully this year will see quite a few things ticked off my bucket list! I also plan to use this year out as a way to clear my head and really help me decide where I want to go in the future and how I can get there. I think since joining my church a year ago and going to India this summer I've started to realise who I want to be, my main question now is how do I become that person. So I'm giving this year in my life to God. So we can develop our relationship further, so He can use me for good and so He can help me find my identity.
Think that's about all for now folks! Sorry about the essay of a post but a lot's been going on that I wanted to get off my chest!
Laterzzzz
Saturday, 7 July 2012
The bucket list!
My bucket list:
- Meet an idol of mine
- Visit Harry Potter world
- Visit Laguna Beach
- Work abroad
- Go on a road trip around America
- Give back to my parents
- Win someone to Jesus
Start a blog- Kiss in the rain
Fall in love- Have my dream wedding and honeymoon
- Have children
- Be confident in my own skin
Help a stranger- Change a child's life
- Stay up all night, watching the sun set and rise
- Have a BBQ on a beach
- Visit Christian pilgrimage sites
- Go to a yoga retreat
- Have a girly holiday
- Save an animal
- Travel the world
- Learn an instrument
- Find a sport I enjoy (and am good at!)
- Get a head-to-toe makeover
- Go on a spontaneous, completely unplanned trip
- Try vegetarianism
- Help in a social cause
- Contribute to charity
Work within a church- Thank someone who wouldn't expect it
- Plant a time capsule and open it in 10 years
- Live without technology for a month
- Make a scrapbook
- Keep a diary for a year
- Design and create my perfect room
- Purposely face a fear and overcome it
- Attend a Bible course
- Attend a midnight premiere
- Join a choir
- Apologize to someone about the past
- Forgive someone about the past
- Find my spiritual talent and use it
- Find my passion and get a job involving it
- Be a mentor
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